Why No One Remembers You

“Doctors bury their mistakes, judges hang them, 

and journalists print theirs on the front page.”

This saying highlights the consequences of attention deficit that is plaguing our society.  It also underscores a deeper issue: In conversations, meetings, and even at home, we're physically present but mentally elsewhere.  We've mastered the art of being in two places at once – here, but not really here.

This lapse in focus can lead to severe outcomes.  A doctor overlooks a symptom, and tragedy follows.  A driver checks his phone, and disaster strikes.  A customer service rep recites scripts without truly comprehending the issue.  The uncomfortable truth is:  they all think they're paying attention, but they aren't.

Our world is designed to distract us.  Infinite scrolls, notifications every 40 seconds, and constant context-switching.  This must be actively corrected, if we want to reclaim our focus.

The irony is that in trying to do more, we often end up doing less.  Multitasking, speed-reading, and optimizing are habits that sabotage depth for the illusion of speed.  We fail to realize that slowing down is sometimes the fastest way forward.

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The antidote to this problem is active, disciplined attention:

• Don’t just read – comprehend.

• Don’t just hear – listen.

• Don’t just see – observe.

Consider the snake, which detects the faintest vibration and strikes with precision, ignoring all else.  That's focus.  Train your mind to filter out the noise and lock onto what matters.

In the workplace, this ability to focus ensures a competitive edge.  The person who truly listens gets remembered and promoted.  At home, it deepens connections.  Make your partner feel seen, not skimmed over.  In a world drowning in distraction, focus itself becomes a superpower.

Your challenge:

In your next conversation, give your full focus.  Choose attention over distraction.  Put your phone face-down, look up, and pause before responding.  Notice how things shift.

The cost of a wandering mind is far too high.  By making a conscious effort to focus, you can reclaim your attention, deepen your connections, and achieve more by doing less.

Don’t Take the Bait

How many times have you paused scrolling on your favorite social media feed, tempted by a post that promises the world?  “Invest ₹50,000 and earn ₹10,000 every month!” or “100% herbal cure for diabetes!” or “Brand-new AC for just ₹1,500!” or “Install this app and watch all the latest movies for free!”

They look irresistible, but behind those shiny promises lurk digital traps waiting to steal your money or personal data.  And when we share them without checking, we help those scams travel further and faster.

These posts feed on two of our biggest weaknesses: greed and gullibility.  Each click fuels a scammer’s earnings, or worse, exposes our email, bank, or identity details to criminals.

The golden rule? If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.  Pause before you click.

Run a quick scan.

Does the post feel genuine?  Is there fake urgency like “Offer ends in 24 hours”?  Are there spelling errors, awkward phrasing, or too many CAPITAL LETTERS screaming at you?

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Now, ask yourself:

If making money were that simple, would anyone share it online instead of quietly cashing in?  If a miracle herb could cure chronic illness, wouldn’t hospitals be prescribing it?  If a big company were giving away expensive products, how would it stay in business?

Still hearing that whisper: “But what if it’s true?”  That’s the bait working.  Shut it down with one question: Where’s the proof?

A few seconds of doubt can save you from weeks of regret.  Use common sense, verify before trusting, and never share personal or financial details with unknown sources.

Next time you see an unbelievable offer, take 30 seconds to verify it. Your caution protects not just you—but everyone in your digital circle.

Stop Apologizing for Being Selfish

“Don’t be so selfish!”

We’ve heard this since childhood, and somewhere along the way, we turned 'selfish' into the ugliest word in our vocabulary.  But in our rush to condemn it, we forgot to ask a crucial question: don't we actually need it?

Selfishness is everywhere.

In the orator who won’t surrender the mic, the commuter who dives for the window seat before the train stops, the relative who picks the ripest mango and leaves you the bruised one.  Crude, sneaky, and uncomfortably familiar.

The truth? 

Every creature, from ants to elephants to us, looks out for itself first.  Survival demands it.  You can’t feed others if you’re starving.  Even airplane safety cards remind us: put on your own oxygen mask before assisting others.

So yes, a dash of selfishness is essential.  It helps you say no, protect your peace, and stay sane.  Think of it like lizards eating bugs - unpleasant, but necessary.

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The problem is, we’re squeamish about admitting it.  So we disguise it:

* The entrepreneur is “creating jobs” (and getting rich).

* The artist is “sharing his vision” (and building a brand).

* The parent “wants the best for their child” (but not the neighbour’s).

But when selfishness becomes a lifestyle, it stops being self-preservation, like the boss who steals credit, the friend who only calls when they need something.  Remember the Titanic’s half-empty lifeboats?  They weren’t just a logistical failure; they were a chilling triumph of selfishness.

Self-interest drives progress.  But selfishness without awareness breeds jealousy, greed, and quiet cruelty.

The key is balance.

Be like a trapeze artist.  Selfish enough to protect your soul, but not so much that you wear a permanent "Do Not Disturb sign" .

After all, caring for yourself isn’t selfish.  It’s how you make sure you have something worth sharing.  Honor your needs, but never at the cost of another’s dignity. 

Hypocrisy: The Mask We Forget to Remove

We all wear masks.  Some are polite.  Some are protective.  But hypocrisy? That’s the mask that lies.

It’s saying one thing and doing another, preaching honesty while cheating in silence, championing kindness while gossiping behind backs.  Hypocrisy isn’t just contradiction.  It’s a betrayal of trust.

Is a half-truth a whole lie?

We sugarcoat our stories to sound better and braver such as “between jobs” instead of unemployed, “first time to Europe” for a maiden overseas trip, and “combined income” that mostly leans on spouse’s earnings.

These aren’t bold lies, just clever edits like makeup on a tired face.  But they add up.

When someone exaggerates struggles or inflates their worth with words, they aren’t just reshaping a story, but reshaping how they wish to be seen.  And somewhere in that performance, they lose sight of who they are.  The gap between the life we live and the story we tell doesn’t build pride.  It breeds quiet shame.  Hypocrisy isn’t only in what we pretend.  It's also what we choose not to say

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Why do we do it?

Fear, mostly.  Fear of judgment.  Fear of pity.  The hunger to be admired.  A politician speaks of sacrifice but lives in luxury.  A parent teaches respect but mocks others.  A friend vows loyalty but vanishes when needed.  Each moment chips away at trust because they're false.

So what’s the way out?

Not perfection.  Not preaching.  But honesty, starting with ourselves first.  When we admit our flaws, we become more human.  When we speak with truth, we build trust.  And when we act with integrity, we inspire others to do the same.

We've all pretended; smiled through anger; promised what we didn't mean; judged others without reason.  Why?  Sometimes to protect ourselves.  Sometimes to gain attention.  

What's your take on this?  When was the last time you wore a mask?

The Mask of Pretensions

David Foster Wallace once joked, “I’m not a pretentious person. I just have a lot of opinions about things I know nothing about.”

Does that ring a bell?  Most of us have met someone who tries too hard, someone desperate to appear richer, smarter, or more important than they really are.  You may have seen such a person at a party, in a job interview, or scrolling through social media.

Pretension is everywhere.  Students, professionals, influencers, even politicians slip on this mask.  It shows up in name-dropping, in using long and complicated words when simple ones would do, in boasting about achievements, or flashing wealth to impress.  It is not a natural personality; it is a carefully staged performance.sn't the problem.  

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How do you recognize it?

Notice the signs: big words without real meaning, constant mentions of “important” people, exaggerated success stories, or an attitude of superiority with little substance behind it.  Real confidence is quiet and steady.  Pretension is loud but empty.

Why do people pretend?

The answer is usually fear.  Fear of being overlooked, judged, or rejected.  Pretension becomes a shield to hide insecurity.  But here’s the truth: authenticity is more powerful; simpler; stronger; longer lasting.  You don’t have to dazzle people; you just have to connect.  Speak in plain words.  Share your real story.  Ask yourself: Why do I feel the need to perform?  Often you’ll find that the unmasked version of yourself is already enough.

There’s also a close cousin of pretension: hypocrisy.  If pretension is feigning to have what you don’t, hypocrisy is pretending to be what you aren’t, or saying one thing while doing another.  Both are forms of deception; both keep people at a distance.

The world doesn’t need another act.  It needs honesty.  Take off the mask. Let us meet the real you.